


Reaching Out to Meet Your Needs

by Hammocker



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Angst, Disney Songs, Disney World, Epcot, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Retro Disney Park Things, Self-Hatred, Steve is there for Him, Tony Stark Has Issues, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, kinda meta
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-21
Updated: 2016-07-05
Packaged: 2018-07-16 11:25:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7266169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hammocker/pseuds/Hammocker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony didn't get nostalgia. The past was a horrible slimy mass of pain, depression, and regret. So why was this making him so damn happy?</p><p>This fic is discontinued and will be rewritten and restarted elsewhere.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Tiny Little Seed

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a goddamn dork for writing this. Does anyone else want this? Tony having EPCOT memories? Anyone who cares about Epcot at all anymore? No? Don't blame you, honestly.
> 
> If you already are familiar with Epcot, as well as its past and present, you might like this, or really hate it. If not, well, I'm gonna try to make it accessible. However, I do recommend listening to these tracks for this chapter. I hate to use music in writing, but it's kind of important thematically. Future chapters will likely have different tracks on them.
> 
> [Listen to the Land](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GB9XVF80Lw)  
> [Energy (You Make the World Go 'Round)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RY_l1uQ-ZoA)  
> [Horizons](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZaU-Oqo-qs) (I'd reccommend only listening to the first minute and a half or so here, unless you find yourself enthralled.)

Demons were something Tony Stark had grown accustomed to. Things that ate away at his mind every day, every night. Little inklings that lodged themselves into his head when he was at a tender age and never quite left. Always there in the back of his head, waiting for the day when they’d detonate. Today was the day for one of those demons. One of them that Tony had no idea how to deal with. A nefarious, spontaneous, ridiculously catchy little memory that came out of nowhere and would not leave him alone.

Tony had a song stuck in his head. For the life of him, no matter what he did or how he tried to distract himself, it would not leave.

He desperately tried to keep his focus on the damaged circuit board in front of him. Black Sabbath pumped from the speakers around his labs, but it did nothing to drown out the squirming, writhing song that had burrowed its way into his brain.

He let out a sigh. If you can’t beat’em, join’em.

“JARVIS, music off,” Tony called. He paused for the command to be carried out before continuing, “Search query “Listen to the Land song EPCOT.” I’m feeling lucky.”

“Very well, sir,” the AI acknowledged.

Tony had about a second to prepare himself before that all-too familiar tune and voice started piping through his speakers. The noodling acoustic guitar and the guy with a spot-on kiddie entertainer voice. He rolled his eyes. It was hokey and silly and not to his taste. Still, Tony wasn’t inclined to turn it off. He hadn’t heard it in- God, how long had it been? 30 years? No. No, it was before 91, at least. He’d been at EPCOT Center with his parents, he knew that much. 1988? 89? Something. Probably a good thing that he didn’t remember too well. He didn’t need to think about that time.

Nonetheless, as he listened, tattered memories started piecing themselves together in his mind. Flashes of what he’d seen and done, the feelings, the sounds, the smell of the place. Never anything too solid, but bits and pieces of a time long past. If Tony didn’t know any better, he might have called what he was feeling “nostalgia.” But he didn’t get nostalgia. Tony didn’t have rose-tinted glasses for the past, he had a grimy, dirty filter for it. The past was just a horrible, slimy mass of pain, depression, and regrets. He lived for today every day. So why was this making him so damn happy?

Maybe it was something about how simple and plain nice the music was. It should have made him gag. Maybe he was just having a good day. Maybe there was some child-like joy still buried somewhere in the recesses of his cold, cold heart. Maybe- no, of course not. But maybe- no. No happy memories could be attached to him going to some tacky tourist trap with his folks. He didn’t have good memories where his dad was involved.

Except maybe it had been fun. If he remembered something so small so long after being there, there had to be something to it. Everything was foggy around their visit, but now that it was on his mind, he couldn’t help but recall. His mom definitely liked the place, liked the rides and just being there with her family. Howard, well, Tony knew he had some stake in EPCOT, something to do with him and old Walt being buddy-buddy before Tony came around. Tony didn’t remember much of him on that particular day, though, and maybe that was for the best.

Still, if the experience was alright aside from Howard, that would explain the bizarre pleasant feeling he got from the Listen to the Land thing. How he’d remembered its name was a mystery, but he supposed there were worse things lurking in his long-term memory. Couldn’t hurt to delve deeper.

He wheeled his chair over to his tablet and pulled up the page JARVIS had navigated to. Sure enough, it was a Youtube video and there were already related suggestions at the side of the page. “Energy (You Make the World Go ‘Round)” was definitely familiar. The name brought images of dinosaurs and wide open spaces. He selected it and placed the tablet back down once more.

One stupid, hokey tune led to another.

The circuit board became more of an excuse to sit there and reminisce than an actual project to be worked on. The energy song was kinda actually pretty good. Melodramatic for a song that was literally just about energy, but good. He found himself with grainy images running through his head. Two things stood out: Howard falling asleep and the dinosaurs. He half-smiled for a moment. That was right, it had been a boring, overly long presentation about energy. Sponsored by Exxon, of course. Even corporate schmoozer Howard couldn’t sit through it.

But then there were the dinosaurs. Those enormous, imposing, stiff mechanical creatures. Tony hadn’t really known what to expect so seeing a robotic dinosaur had been- impressive? Yeah, that was the word. Impressive at the time, maybe. Even if he could have built better animatronics himself at that age. Not like he would want to. What was the point of cute, but useless robots anyway? So some slob tourists could gawk at them? Stupid. Nothing to be impressed at.

The song was over as soon as it began and Tony had to wheel over a second time. A playlist titled simply “Epcot Music” had popped up in the suggestions and he tapped it without much thought.

He was hit with a jazzy, but soft intro that promptly transitioned to a children’s choir. It was bad enough that the music was strikingly familiar, but the mantra being repeated pulled at something buried deep in his subconscious. “If we can dream it, then we can do it.” It was so disgustingly optimistic and uplifting and genuine, and that wasn’t changing as the track continued. Steve would have loved it, dearest, purest of heart Steve, but God did it make Tony shudder. He couldn’t deny that it meant something to him, though, even if he couldn’t pinpoint what or why. And it wasn’t like what he did for a living didn’t follow that too-simple philosophy in some ways. Tony had wanted to do great things for the world at some point in his life. That got lost somewhere down the line, but he liked to think he was back on a better route, even if he was still a miserable failure who would never make up for his past misdeeds. That was okay now. Just fine. He could do some good for the world at least, even if he would never be great. New horizons. Realistic horizons. Horizons. There had been a thing called Horizons and he was listening to its theme. The wonders of human memory.

Tony shifted the circuit board out of the way so he could rest his head on the workbench. Even after the vocals had stopped, the same smooth jazz played on, a little more subdued than before. It was upbeat, but relaxing, and lulled his normally too-loud train of thought into a pleasant hum. Tony found his eyes closing and his mind drifting off.

“Tony?”

Tony started, scrambling to right himself. How long had he been out? When had Steve come into the lab? Listen to the Land was playing again. Why was it playing? It shouldn’t have been playing; he really didn’t need Steve getting sucked into the depths of his past.

Before he even found his voice again, Tony turned to look at Steve. His boyfriend- was that right? Steve was actually his boyfriend and he wasn’t just dreaming that? Yes. He was going to go with yes, that was true. His boyfriend was standing over him, smiling like the angel he was. Tony was caught so off guard that words continued to evade him long enough for Steve to speak once more.

“I’m glad you’re not pushing yourself or trying to blow out your ears, but you’d be more comfortable in bed.”

“I- I am, actually,” Tony finally managed. “Trying to blow out my ears, that is. Can’t stand this kinda crap, how’d it get put on?”

“Real mystery,” Steve said, giving him a knowing smile. “I’m just happy I can hear myself for once.”

“Yeah. Nice hearing you too.”

“So are you coming to bed or not?”

“Oh, yeah, yeah, ‘course,” Tony said, clumsily hauling himself to his feet. “J, bookmark all of those previous links.”

“Of course, sir,” JARVIS replied, and, though Tony knew he couldn’t truly emote, he couldn’t help but hear an eye roll in JARVIS’ voice.

“No idea how it got on, huh?” Steve asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Nope. Not a single clue,” Tony confirmed, briefly oblivious to the contradiction in his claims.

“Uh huh.”

Tony only took a single step away from his bench before he felt Steve reached out to grab his wrist and pull him back.

“Wha-” Tony managed a single syllable before Steve bent down to haul him into his arms by the underside of his legs and back. It still shocked Tony, how easy it was for Steve to manhandle and carry him around without breaking a single sweat. It shouldn’t have been surprising; Steve wasn’t a normal human in terms of physicality, after all. Nonetheless, it didn’t do Tony’s pride any favors.

“Steve, I can walk,” he pointed out, squirming a bit against Steve’s grip.

“You sure can,” Steve agreed, adjusting his hold so Tony couldn’t slip away.

Tony gave a discontented “hrm,” but settled in with no further complaints. He wasn’t going anywhere, so why bother trying? Steve was warm and soft and familiar so he’d be an idiot to want to get away. He leaned up against Steve with a sigh and let his eyelids droop once again. So long as Steve was there, he didn’t care where they were going.

*****

Even after getting upstairs to their room, having a hot shower, and flopping down into bed with the man he loved, Tony couldn’t shake off that tune that had invaded his head. In fact, it was joined by a couple of others now that he’d gone and looked into it. That was a dumb move, feeding whatever it was keeping his mind on that place. On his parents. He didn’t want anything to do with it. Nine times out of ten, dwelling on the past had only clouded his judgement so he made stupid decisions. Like he didn’t do enough of that anyway. He had been doing better, at least, with Steve and everyone else around more.

He pressed his face closer to Steve’s torso. He loved Steve, he really did, more than he’d ever thought he was capable of loving anyone. And Steve loved him back; he constantly reiterated that to Tony, who was enough of an idiot to doubt that Steve could ever not mean what he said. That was the thing: Tony felt like he gave so little back to Steve. He could give Steve stuff. Tony gave everyone stuff, but Steve deserved more than that. He deserved someone whose moments of weakness were just moments, not days and weeks of bunkering himself from the world so nobody had to see him. Granted, those periods had become steadily shorter and shorter since even before he and Steve had become a real couple, but that was just another example of Steve giving and Tony taking on a higher level. Tony always took from people. He wasn’t sure he even knew how to do anything else. He hated that about himself.

Steve’s hand gently migrated up from his back to his shoulders, giving Tony a heads-up that he was still very much awake. 

“Something’s on your mind,” Steve said, just barely above a whisper.

Tony tensed up. It was a little unnerving how well Steve read him at times. Of course, Tony wasn’t exactly a subtle person so he couldn’t be too surprised.

“No, it’s- it’s nothing.”

“Nothing doesn’t keep you up at night,” Steve pointed out. “You don’t have to suffer in silence, you know.”

Tony clenched his teeth. The way Steve was supportive but never pushy put him to shame. He didn’t want Steve worried about him. He hated being a weight like that. And maybe it would help his nerves to get confirmation on whether or not he was really losing it this time.

“You remember that stuff I was listening to? In my lab?”

“Sure do. Sorta.”

“Well, it was-” Tony felt humiliated just trying to find the words. “God, it’s just- it even sounds stupid in my head.”

“We got all night.”

The idea of keeping Steve up all night while he tried to dig up the right explanation was horrifying. That could not be allowed to happen. He sat up and slid back so he could sit next to Steve without really looking at him.

“Back in ‘89, I went to a park. With my folks.”

“A park?” Steve echoed, sitting up as well and making sure to look at Tony.

“Yeah, but not like your trees and greenery sorta park, no, a real theme park.”

“That’s like an amusement park, right?”

“If you blew up the budget a hundred times what it should be, sure. Roller coasters are one thing, but EPCOT wanted to be a permanent world’s fair.”

“EPCOT. Huh.” Steve pursed his lips, as though the name alone was something to ponder. “Thought world’s fairs were supposed to be temporary.”

“And you would be right. The place was cheesy and outdated.”

“Why the smile then?”

Tony wasn’t smiling. Was he? He hadn’t thought he was, but- no. No, he was. Half-smiling anyway. That was not his intent and only added to his frustration.

“I- I don’t know,” he rasped, drawing up into himself. “I remember a bunch of little things and I don’t know why or if they’re happy or depressing or whatever and it’s pissing me off.”

Steve put an arm around Tony’s shoulder and brought him close. He stroked a soothing hand down Tony’s arm.

“Tell me about it,” he said. If Tony didn’t know better, he might have said Steve sounded genuinely interested. “About being there. What sticks out?”

Tony leaned his head against Steve’s shoulder and took in a deep breath. It couldn’t be too bad to talk about it. What little he remembered.

“We were there for- A new part of the park was opening. This golden dome. Inside it was like- like a carnival dedicated to the human body and life. Some theaters. A simulator thing inside a body.”

“Inside a body?” Steve echoed.

“Yeah, it was, like, you went into this pod and it shook you around inside a body. It was alright, I guess.”

It was more than alright, now that Tony thought about it. He’d really enjoyed the experience. All it had been was a motion simulator that knocked him around a bit, but it was also more than that. It was part of a whole; a pocket world where things that had been improbable at the time became possible. Everything cohesive and flowing and plain old fun.

“Sounds- odd,” Steve said, shrugging his shoulders “But fun.”

“And-” The word hung in the air for a moment as Tony reconciled a vaguely connected memory. “-and there was a dragon.”

“A dragon at a world’s fair?” Steve echoed, incredulous this time.

“Sure. Not, like, huge and firebreathing. Just a singing, purple figment.” Figment. There was another one of those words that put together a fragmented memory. Tony brought up a hand over his mouth to hide a growing smile. “A figment of imagination,” he mumbled, a jovial undertone in his voice.

“I see you,” Steve said, reciprocating his smile.

“There was a lot of singing, actually, all over the place,” Tony pushed on, evading Steve’s eyes once again. “Guess it figures that that would stick.”

“That’s what that land song was?”

“Yeah. That was part of a boat ride with plants and things. Mom liked it so we were on it more than once.”

“Can see why it’d stay with you,” Steve said with a short laugh. “It’s gonna be in my head too now.”

“Serves you right for poking around my memory. Nothing good in here.”

“I don’t believe that. I mean, you just told me about a good time you had with your parents.”

“It wasn’t,” Tony retorted instantaneously.

Steve raised his brow and blinked slowly at him.

“Well. I guess it was. A little.” Tony let out a sigh and relaxed his shoulders. Who was he kidding? “Okay, so maybe when I think about it, yeah, it was fun. It’s a theme park and my mom was with me so of course it was.”

Steve squinted at him. “Not Howard?”

“He was there part of the day. Maybe half. The rest, busy sucking up to some MetLife goons, I guess.” Tony frowned and drew up into himself once more. “That’s why we were there in the first place.”

“You don’t think he wanted to spend time with his family at all?”

“No,” Tony said flatly. “That wasn’t Howard.”

Steve hesitated, like he had something he wanted to say. It gave Tony time to feel a little bad about how coldly he’d dismissed his father. Just a little.

“I’m just glad it was a happy time for you,” Steve said at last. “Why haven’t you mentioned this before?”

“I didn’t think about it. Didn’t even remember it until today,” Tony explained with a shrug. “Figured you wouldn’t care that much anyway.”

“If something’s important to you, Tony, I’ll always care. I like hearing about this kind of thing.”

“It’s not that important,” Tony mumbled, leaning over to wrap an arm around Steve and rest his head on his shoulder.

Steve brought up a hand to run down Tony’s scalp and neck.

“If that’s what you think,” he conceded.

Tony found his muscles finally relaxing and his eyes drooping on their own. Maybe talking about yesteryear had its utility after all. Sure, it wasn’t something he liked to do, but if it got some nervous energy out of him, Tony couldn’t complain. Steve was nice about it. Nicer than Tony ever would have been. Tony gritted his teeth thinking about that. He could be mean and bitey when he shouldn’t have been and Steve forgave him every single time. Shame didn’t begin to describe how that made Tony feel.

No use worrying. Better to sleep and let himself reset. Everything was out in the open and he’d never have to deal with it again. That thought made him smile. Move forward, that was all he could do. Or at least not move back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know if Disney exists in the MCU, but it's gonna exist for the sake of this. And Howard definitely would have had to have known Walt. I mean, have you seen his segments in Iron Man 2? He's totally taking a page from Walt Disney's Wonderful World of Color.
> 
> We're going to Epcot in this fic, I want to make that clear right now. I want to try to make this as accurate to the current (or recent) state of Epcot as possible, while not making it a total advertisement. I love Epcot, in both current and past forms, I will say that now. It's my favorite Disney park. But this fic will be about Tony and Steve and their relationship. Epcot is simply a very specific backdrop.
> 
> I'm upset that I'm not allowed to use the Magic Journeys soundtrack. I mean, I want use it, but it only lasted until 86 and Captain EO was a staple by that point and Magic Journeys is so good. Oh, well.


	2. Welcome Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No music is necessary for thematic purposes this chapter. But if you care, the [Animal Kingdom Lodge Loop](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QBpCtXQM_Ss) has some good mood music for this.

Tony had thought that that would be the end of it. For a few weeks he was able to go on living like normal. Working on projects, fixing things, pissing around like he had a habit of doing. Maybe once or twice he pulled up some EPCOT music as a break from his usual palate, but things kept on just as they always had. He almost thought it might last.

He was in his lab that afternoon. It was a nice day, he knew, and Steve had wanted him to come outside and enjoy the weather. Tony knew it would have been good for him, but he just hadn’t felt like it. Making up an excuse about needing to get work done was easy enough, even if he felt a little bad for disappointing Steve. He’d been outside earlier in the week so one day couldn’t hurt.

It was right around four when he heard the door open. It didn’t immediately register as he was busy re-soldering some components onto the back of Dummy’s control panel. The work didn’t really need to be done; it hadn’t been that long at all since he’d first built Dummy. But it was relaxing and simple and comfortable.

“Hey, Tony,” Steve called from across the room.

“Oh, uh, minute please,” he said, switching off the iron and pulling his goggles over his forehead before swiveling around to smile at his boyfriend. “Hi, Steve,” 

“Hey,” Steve repeated, his eyes darting away from Tony’s periodically. That was weird. Come to think of it, it was weird for Steve to come down at this time of day. Sure, Steve checked up on him here and there, but usually it was before two or after five. Steve liked to get as much as he could out of the daylight hours.

“So,” Tony started when Steve hesitated. “Did you need something? Want something? Just wanted to see my beautiful face?”

Steve laughed at that and seemed to relax a bit. He approached Tony, but continued his bout of silence and lack of eye contact. His lips were pulled tight and he had a nervous smile on, like he wanted to say something, but couldn’t quite find the words.

“You know how you told me about Epcot and that music and Disney World a while back?” he finally asked.

“Yeah,” Tony replied slowly. “Hard to forget something that stupid. What about?”

“It’s not stupid, Tony,” Steve said, leaning down to put a hand on his shoulder. “Not at all. I’ve been doing some digging of my own, actually.”

“Yeah?” Tony said, narrowing his eyes. “And what did you dig up?”

Steve clicked his tongue before pausing once again. A sinking feeling promptly developed in Tony’s chest.

“I want us to go next month,” Steve finally said, all in one breath. “I’ve already got plans in place.”

Tony’s face went blank and his jaw went slack. What? Next month? How? Why? What had Steve been doing without telling him? What plans?

“Steve, you can’t just- I’m busy. We’re busy. Who knows what I’ll have to do that week?”

“We’ve taken weeks off before. Saving the world doesn’t have to happen every day.”

Very true, both of those points. He’d taken Steve to Costa Rica not that long ago. Still, Tony wasn’t going to give up just like that.

“But- but we can’t just be there! It’s crowded and public and we’re-”

“Covered,” Steve cut in. “Public figures go all the time. We’ll have a private guide. And you know I won’t let anyone get too close.”

“But- we can’t- we might have to be somewhere and-”

“Yes, we can,” Steve broke in once more. “I talked to the team and Fury about it. They’ll be fine without us. It’ll only be a week and we can always fly on back if there’s an emergency.”

Tony brought his hands up to rub down his face. God, Steve had set his mind on this. He regretted ever bringing it up. He should have just kept it to himself.

“Why did I teach you to use the internet?” he mumbled.

“I talked most of it out on the phone, actually,” Steve told him. “We have a room, passes, a few reservations, and these funny band thingies on the way.”

“Band thingies?” Tony said, looking up at Steve with wide, distracted eyes.

“Yeah, you strap’em on your wrist and they’re keys and tickets and reservations all in one place. Or that’s what they told me.”

Tony didn’t really care that much about the band thingies, but he was suddenly very confused and a little upset. At best, it was because Steve hadn’t even talked to him first before doing all this, at worst it was because he might have to confront things that would bring back memories.

“You couldn’t have at least said something? Just a little “Hi, honey, I’m home, also I’m planning to take us both to a tourist trap, thanks.””

“Aw, Tony,” Steve sighed, a glint of guilt in his eyes. “I thought it’d be easier if I didn’t give you the chance to worry about it before things were in place.”

“Well, it’s not,” Tony snapped. He sounded bratty, he knew, but he had some right to be, given how suddenly all this had been sprung on him.

Then Steve made that sad-eyed frown, that disappointed, utterly crushed look he got when Tony was being especially stubborn. Tony immediately felt bad.

Steve let out a breath through his nose and looked away from Tony as he thought about it. For a moment, Tony thought he might just leave and this whole thing would go away. But nothing was ever that easy, of course.

“Look, I’d never ask you to do anything you don’t want to outside of the field,” Steve finally said. “But I really do want to go and I won’t have nearly as much fun without you. So please come with me?” He leaned forward with a cautious smile and pleading eyes. “Please?”

Tony still wanted to say no. He didn’t want to have his time wasted or to walk until his feet divorced him or to go back to something he’d left in the past. But stupid Steve and his stupid patience and his stupidly hard-to-say-no-to face were all making it impossible. 

“Okay,” he groaned. “I guess it couldn’t be that bad.”

Right away, Steve’s arms were around him and he was being picked up off of his chair. Steve planted a long kiss on his cheek before pressing his forehead against Tony’s. Tony wasn’t prepared and just stiffened up in his arms. He liked the affection, sure, but Steve was one step off from crushing him.

“You’re the best, you know that?” he said, so very genuine and guileless.

“Not really,” Tony gritted out.

“Well, you are,” Steve reiterated, releasing him back onto his chair. “And if you argue with me about that, I’m gonna break something.”

“Mean,” Tony said, wrinkling his nose and pouting a bit.

“We’re gonna have a good time,” Steve assured him as he took Tony’s hand and squeezed lightly. “Promise.”

Tony didn’t entirely believe Steve. He couldn’t imagine himself having fun going back to that place, not at the point he was at in his life. But Steve hadn’t broken a promise made to him yet, and he’d only ever broken Tony’s trust once. Maybe things really would go just fine. Maybe the days would go by quickly. No matter what, if Steve was there, Tony knew he could get through anything. A few days at a theme park would be a cakewalk.

*****

The jet’s motor hummed in Tony’s ears as he sat staring at the band around his wrist. He could barely believe that he and Steve were already on their way to Florida. After a month of trying to forget about their plans and a week of stalling on packing, Steve had finally dragged him to their flight. It was horrifying and even then Tony was trying to deny what they were traveling for.

The “band thingies” turned out to be what they called “MagicBands.” RFID technology that stored all their necessary information in one convenient little strap. Of course, Steve couldn’t have just gotten them both solid color straps, no, he had to go out of his way to get Tony a Figment band. Once again, Tony regretted telling Steve anything.

“I thought you’d like to have an old friend around,” Steve had said.

“That dragon was never my friend,” Tony had told him. “And purple isn’t my color.”

Steve had just shrugged and told him it was too late to change now. It was bad enough that he’d be walking around with a goddamn wrist strap, but having the stupid little dragon constantly on display was just pushing it.

So Tony stared. And Figment smiled back. He was half-afraid that Figment might break out into song if he wasn’t watched. Tony might tear his hair out or, worse, start sobbing hysterically if that happened. That could not be allowed.

“You doing okay, Tony?” Steve asked, putting a hand on his shoulder and breaking his concentration.

“What?” Tony said as he broke out of his daze and looked to Steve. “No. No, no, I’m not okay really. I’m still wondering why I agreed to this.”

“Just give it a chance,” Steve said, reaching over to take his hand. “No one ever liked anything they didn’t want to like.”

“There’s alotta things I don’t want to like; cabbage, folk music, long-winded novels. I live very well preemptively removing certain things that I know I won’t like from my life.”

“Sounds like a good recipe for getting bored,” Steve commented, giving Tony a raised brow as well as an affectionate smile. “Good thing I’m more stubborn than you.”

“We’ll see about that,” Tony shot back before continuing at a hurried pace. “Still wondering why you got solid blue and I couldn’t get red.”

“You’re special so I wanted to get you something special. Something you’d like.” He gave his own wristband a thoughtful glance. “If it’d make you happy, maybe I’ll see about getting a different one with something I like on it.”

Tony huffed and rolled his eyes. Where did Steve get off presuming that Tony liked something he hadn’t seen in thirty years? Or that he was a good kind of special? Never mind that Steve was almost always right about him, Tony wasn’t going to let him get away with that.

“It wouldn’t,” Tony said, leaning up against Steve. It was a weak response, but he wasn’t ready to give in just yet.

“Well. At least royal purple looks nice on you,” Steve said, putting an arm around Tony.

A muffled groan escaped Tony’s throat, but he was out of steam when it came to fighting Steve on the subject. He’d been out of steam for weeks, really. For every complaint he made, Steve had a calm, sensible point in response. Tony didn’t understand how anyone could be so positive all the time. It was as infuriating as it was endearing. But who knows? Maybe he was just being unreasonable. Maybe.

*****

Tony stared up at their hotel through his sunglasses. It was a wide U-shaped building, made up of red clay and thatched roofing. Most of it had to be a facade. No way would something authentic get past building codes. Just above the sliding doors, an intentionally crude plaque read “welcome home”. Tony did not feel particularly at home. Even just standing there, gripping his bag’s handle tight, he was already feeling on edge and lied to. On top of that, the humidity was nigh unbearable, especially for it being mid-fall. He was beginning to question Steve’s taste in resorts.

Steve seemed positively giddy already. He’d delayed grabbing his luggage to step back and take in the front of the place. Tony was well-aware that Steve smiled more often than he didn’t, but he’d rarely seen an expression of sheer excitement on his face. He’d nearly busted the car door in his hurry to get out and look. Tony was left confused. Was the most exciting thing in their lives really a themed resort? After they’d fought aliens and gods and mad robots? If anything, this was downright mundane. Tony was just glad that Steve wasn’t insisting on taking their picture in front of the thing.

It took a good three minutes before Steve had finally had his fill of the front of the building and he retrieved his own bag. From there he shut the trunk, thanked their driver, and turned back to Tony.

“Want me to carry that?” he asked, eying Tony’s bag.

“No, I can handle it,” Tony insisted curtly, raising his chin up.

Steve gave a laugh before taking his hand and leading them both inside.

Following the blast of cool air, Tony looked up to find them at the front of a wide open lobby with natural sunlight filtering in from a the window that served as the entire back wall. Bridges stretched off from balconies up above, connecting the higher levels. Everything, absolutely everything, was either naturalistic or animal-themed or African flavored. There was even a faint sound of some mixture of drums, panpipes, and incomprehensible singing playing somewhere nearby. It was a huge amount to take in all at once. Tony swallowed thickly. No walking out now; he was in too deep. At the same time, his brain seemed to have stopped working and he had no idea where to go or what to do.

Thank God Steve knew what he was doing. He gently led Tony over to the reception desk, not far off to the right.

“Jambo!” the woman behind the desk said as they approached. She looked to be in her late 20s and wore a tan khaki suit that made her look vaguely like some kind of turn-of-the-century explorer.

Tony narrowed his eyes at her and stayed quiet. He suspected he was being spoke to in code, something he would never learn how to respond to.

“Jambo,” Steve replied in turn. “We have reservations under Rogers.”

She turned her attention to the monitor in front of her, double-clicking on its mouse once before turning back to them.

“Two beds, savannah view Rogers?”

“That’d be us.”

“Then you’re all set. Room 2249, that’s the second floor right down the hall thataway.” She leaned over and pointed up and behind the desk. “Either of your bands will open the room. If you have any questions, just ask, and please feel free to poke around. Welcome home, Captain Rogers, Mr. Stark.”

“Thank you,” Steve said, giving her a modest nod and heading towards the stairway up.

Tony rolled his eyes as soon as she was out of view. How could anyone buy that little spiel? It sounded rehearsed, but so rehearsed that she actually started to mean it after the 20th time of saying it in the mirror. Tony would know; he’d done the same thing for plenty of his speeches.

He broke off from Steve as the reached the steps and grabbed his bag’s handle with both hands before edging it up the first couple steps with effort. Maybe bringing his good laptop had been a mistake. Or the spare pliers. But Tony was not going to be caught off guard so haul he did, even as Steve easily passed him by and disappeared up the stairs. Tony half-considered taking him up on his offer to carry both their luggage, but pride won in the end.

It had to have been at least ten minutes before Tony finally managed his way up to the near-end of the stairs. He had to say, he was pleased with himself for not taking any breaks in between. That was a sign of superior endurance for sure.

“What’d you pack, a ton of bricks?” Steve asked, giving him a repressed smirk from the top of the steps.

“You told me one bag and I need my things just in case-” Tony fired back as he finally cleared the final step and dragged his luggage up with him. “-so don’t blame me.”

“It was a suggestion, not an order.”

“And I was supposed to know that how?”

“I’m not gonna give you orders about how to pack, Tony.” His expression fell and he eyed Tony cautiously. “You didn’t bring any armor though, did you?”

“What? No,” Tony fibbed out of hand. Maybe he had brought one of his collapsibles, but it was only in case of emergencies. You never knew after all. “Of course not, that’s- you told me you didn’t want me to.”

“Tony, I wanted this to be-” Steve reached up to rub at his forehead before sighing and putting on that same damn disappointed frown. “If it makes you feel safe, that’s okay, but I wish you’d told me.”

Tony got a stabbing pain in his heart. If there’s one thing he hated doing, it was disappointing Steve and here he was doing it again. 

They made their way down the hall in silence. Tony could barely stand to look at Steve or himself or anything. Once again he wondered what he was doing there in the first place; all he ever did was cause problems anyway. He didn’t want to ruin Steve’s good time like he’d known he would eventually.

Lost in his inner moping, Tony didn’t see Steve stop abruptly in front of him and walked straight into him.

“What-?”

He only managed the one word before Steve reached over and bodily turned him so they both were looking out the window that Tony hadn’t even noticed. He blinked against the evening sunlight and found himself looking over a lush green grassland. Sparse trees dotted the land, growing thicker farther back on the field. A couple giraffes wandered about, along with some funny-looking hairy pig things. The horizon beyond was splashed orange and pink as the sun dipped lower and lower.

“Look at that,” Steve breathed.

Even Tony had to admit that, yeah, the view was pretty nice. Picturesque even. Pretty obviously artificial, but still picturesque. It could have passed for some African reserve for people who had never been to Africa in their life.

“Come on, while there’s still daylight,” Steve said before tugging him along once again. Between his luggage and Steve’s strength, Tony briefly worried one of his arms might come out of its socket, but he managed in the end.

They didn’t have to walk long from there; room 2249 was just around the bend. Tony breathed a sigh of relief as he read its marker. Finally, he wouldn’t have to lug around his bag anymore. At least until next week, anyway. Just as the lady had said, there was a RFID reader on the door. The two of them exchanged a glance and with a skeptical look at both the reader and his band, Steve brought his up to the door. Sure enough, there was a click and the door slid out of place.

“Magic,” Tony said, an air of sarcasm in the word.

“Magic,” Steve echoed, nodding before pushing his way inside.

If the light gasp was any indication, Steve was pleased with what he saw. Tony made his way in and gave a brief look around for somewhere to put his bag. He found a corner right away, just next to the television cabinet in front of their bed. With that albatross off his back, Tony ditched his sunglasses on their coffee table and flopped sideways onto their bed and let out a sigh. It wasn’t his own bed, but it was pretty damn comfortable, he had to admit.

But just as he was getting comfortable, he tilted his head to the side and noticed a towel made into a very familiar shape. Tony sat up to get a better look at it, sure enough, they were having a mouse problem. Tony could tolerate the enthusiasm, the theming, the atmosphere of the place, but he couldn’t tolerate having a Mickey Mouse shaped towel put into his temporary living space for any reason. With that thought, he swept it off the bed and was disappointed that it held its shape even on the floor.

“Tony, someone made that for us,” Steve chided him. He’d begun unpacking his bag and putting his clothes in their drawer, an act which Tony saw no point in.

“Please, everyone gets these things, it’s probably mass produced.”

“You don’t know that,” Steve said, walking over to pick up the towel and bring it over to the coffee table in the back of the room. “And you should be appreciative anyway.”

Tony gave a grunt of admission, even if he still didn’t see what was so special about a towel in a shape. If Steve saw something in it, there must have been something to it. Maybe he shouldn’t have been so hasty. He laid back on the bed and shut his eyes.

Tony didn’t really fall asleep, but he did fall into a semi-doze. He could hear Steve moving around and occasionally cooing or gasping over something. Once again, he had to wonder what was so special about this place that had Steve captivated. Was it something in the air? The “magic” he’d heard so much about? He was a bit surprised he hadn’t turned into a drooling happy moron.

His sort-of nap was interrupted by a hand tugging his arm. He opened his eyes and found Steve smiling gently down at him, too damn beautiful for his own good with the late evening light washing over him. The sheer, unfiltered affection in his eyes on top of that could have made Tony cry, but he only returned the smile.

“You should see the view,” Steve said, though, Tony wasn’t sure if he’d heard right.

“I’m not?” Tony asked, sleep in his voice.

“Ha. From our balcony, ya goof,” he clarified.

“Right. I knew that.”

Tony allowed himself to be hauled up to his feet, but as soon as he was there, he pitched forward to kiss Steve hard on the lips. Steve let out a laugh of surprise yet still kissed back without any fuss. He put an arm around Tony and held him there as they made it last, licking and nipping at eachother’s lips wherever they could manage. It wasn’t a struggle, but they did compete for dominance over what direction the kiss took. Tony looking for access into Steve’s mouth and Steve keeping him firmly in his place. They separated from each other as little as possible until Tony finally had to pull back to breathe.

“Why don’t you and me take some time for ourselves and, uh, make the place feel like home?” Tony suggested, glancing towards their bathroom door.

“I can get behind that,” Steve said before leaning down to pick Tony up like he was weightless.

“About time you started talking sense, you haven’t-” It was then that Tony realized that Steve was not carrying him to their bathroom. No, he was heading straight for the open sliding door leading out onto their balcony

“Hang up, this is not what I meant,” Tony protested weakly.

“I know,” Steve said, continuing on his way. “But we’ll have plenty more chances for that later. We only have one chance to watch the sunset on our first day here.”

“You’re so neglectful,” Tony said, though, he didn’t struggle as he was settled onto one of the chairs looking out over the fields.

“I’ll make it worth your while,” Steve told him, offering a wink as he sat down himself and took Tony’s hand.

Tony couldn’t argue with that. He certainly couldn’t argue when Steve was holding his hand so tenderly. It was a nice, comfortable pressure, both their arms hanging there between them, entwined at their fingers. A simple gesture that reminded Tony why he’d grown to love Steve.

His gaze drifted out over the faux-savannah where Steve seemed to be looking. Some giraffes and a stray zebra were lazily roving around. He could hear people talking somewhere in the distance, but it was too far away to be bothersome. If Tony had to concede on one thing only, he’d say that the views in the resort were pretty good. And the room wasn’t half-bad on the whole either. And, really, he shouldn’t have complained if the trip meant more personal time with Steve. Steve had always let Tony pick out where and when they vacationed. He was just happy so long as they were together. That was the attitude that Tony needed to take.

“It’s not bad,” he said, more on impulse than thought.

“You think so?”

“No. I mean, I do. I mean- I’m getting used to it.”

“I knew you would.”

“Of course I would. And you would. Well, you wouldn’t get used to it, you wanted this in the first place, but...” Tony stopped himself, sat up in his chair, and breathed in deep. “We’re both here and I wouldn’t be here without you and that’s what’s important. I barely get out of the door on a normal day without you, why wouldn’t it be?”

Steve had watched him with the greatest of patience and interest the entire time. His smile widened as Tony finished, but he didn’t say anything just then. Instead he edged his chair over to Tony’s with a few annoying scrapes on the floor and put an arm around Tony.

“You’re trying, Tony, I know. We both are.”

“You’re having most of the success.”

“Well, I haven’t punched through any walls yet and you haven’t had a meltdown so I’d say we’re both doing pretty good for ourselves so far.”

“Yeah. Guess we are.”

“‘Course we are,” Steve said, giving Tony’s middle a good-natured squeeze. “We’ve always done better as a team.”

Tony felt the corners of his mouth try to turn up and leaned his head against Steve in an effort to hide. He felt like he was being dragged along by Steve nine times out of ten and here Steve was telling him that he was a contributing member of the team. Of their partnership.

“Sure,” he agreed tentatively “Wouldn’t call myself the better half of us.”

“Well, I would. You’re my better half, that’s for sure.”

Tony let out a breathy laugh at that.

“I- I don’t even have any right to compare myself to either of your halves. Or any of you.”

Steve frowned and let a long sigh. Tony felt the dagger from earlier twist in his heart; he’d disappointed Steve and that was a problem, no matter how candid his words had been.

“Makes me sad when you say things like that, you know?” Steve said, gaze drifting off to the side. “You sound so sad.”

“I’m not,” Tony said, even if he wasn’t entirely sure it was the whole truth. “I’m really not.”

Steve looked him in the eye for a long moment before nodding.

“I believe you. I just want us to both be happy with each other. At least more than we have been. And we have been, don’t you think?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I do think,” Tony agreed, nuzzling against Steve as the last flecks of sunlight disappeared on the horizon.

Steve reached over with his free hand to hold Tony’s once again. His fingers drifted over Tony’s palm, feeling over the natural indentation and callouses there. He was still watching the horizon in front of them, but his interest was keenly focused on Tony. Just like his affection was still focused on Tony. That honest affection still struck him as strange, even after years of being with Steve, but he wanted to believe that he deserved it. Questioning Steve’s judgment had historically been a bad choice. If Steve saw something in him then maybe he would see it too some day. He truly wished that he could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I debated which hotel to put these two at for way too long. I thought about the Swan, or the Polynesian Village, or maybe the Grand Floridian, but I figured Steve would go for the more homey Animal Kingdom Lodge in the end, though, we won't see Animal Kingdom in this fic except maybe in passing.
> 
> The more I talk, the more I sound like an enormous dork. I'll stop now.


End file.
